Cat Scan Reveals Large, Benign, Lumpy Mass
In a medical procedure known as a cat-scan, large masses can be identified,
leading to better understanding of medical imagery. This mass, weighing
in at almost 16 pounds, was identified as a relatively harmless, benign
growth. However, irritation to the owner [Patient X] occurs quite frequently
- usually manifesting symptoms at night. Such symptoms can result in
a loss of sleep, sharp pains from the hooks at the end of each tendril
(see Fig.1), or random bruising from the weight of the mass as it rests
on various organs of the body.
Treatment to reduce the size and movement of the mass (see Fig.3),
has apparently had little or no effect. A modified diet has, in fact,
only led to the increase of bothersome symptoms. Eventual intervention
and physical extraction of the mass may, in time, become necessary if
the patient loses much more mobility or the will to leave home for extended
periods of time. "[the mass] takes up a lot of my free time,"
Patient X lamented. "I wish I could go on long trips, but with
all the attention [the mass] requires, I can barely get away for a weekend
here and there."
Fig.1 - The benign mass (outlined here
in yellow) has at least five tendrils angling out away from the
Fig.2 - The lumpy mass has shown to be
quite mobile. In this scan from a slightly different angle, the
tendrils (outlined in yellow) have changed position significantly
from the last scan.
Although the presence of such a large mass worries doctors involved
in the case, the patient has claimed to have an empathic connection
with the mass. "I wouldn't know what I'd do without it... I'd feel
so alone," Patient X commented.
Such feelings are perfectly normal, say doctors. However, a medical
practitioner involved with Patient X's case warns, "the patient
must not let the [benign mass] run his or her life. Though these types
of things seem to be more prevalent in females, men have just as much chance of
developing a benign mass such as this. I told [Patient X] that if left
unchecked, the growth of the mass could lead to arthritic joints, respiratory
trouble, and possibly diabetes."
|Fig.3 - Lateral movement is
documented in the mass. Extreme movement can cause feelings of
axiety for the patient, sometimes leading to feelings of agitation
and fear for the safety of nearby fragile possessions.
At last report, Patient X was doing well. She has decided to rule out
surgical intervention, for now. "I guess you just have to learn
to live with the little problems, and get on with your life," she
said. "I never thought symptoms like hairballs or fear of water
would ever affect me, but you get used to it after a while."
Fig.4 - Shown here in the
most commonly found position, the large mass appears to be resting
in a stretched-out, flaccid state.
|A very old joke:
A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog,
screaming for help. The vet rushes him back to an examination room and
has him put his dog down on the examination table. The vet examines
the still, limp body and after a few moments tells the man that his
dog, regrettably, is dead. The man, clearly agitated and not willing
to accept this, demands a second opinion. The vet goes into the back
room and comes out with a cat and puts the cat down next to the dog's
body. The cat sniffs the body, walks from head to tail poking and sniffing
the dog's body and finally looks at the vet and meows. The vet looks
at the man and says, "I'm sorry, but the cat thinks that your dog is
dead too." The man is still unwilling to accept that his dog is dead.
The vet brings in a black Labrador. The lab sniffs the body, walks from
head to tail, and finally looks at the vet and barks. The vet looks
at the man and says, "I'm sorry, but the lab thinks your dog is dead
too." The man, finally resigned to the diagnosis, thanks the vet and
asks how much he owes. The vet answers, "$650." "$650 to tell me my
dog is dead?" exclaimed the man.... "Well," the vet replies, "I would
only have charged you $50 for my initial diagnosis. The additional $600
was for the cat scan and lab test."